Cheese Balls

Once upon a time there was a little girl named Emily. She was rather small, probably only about five or six.

Now, Emily had a daddy who was very tall and was very funny. She looked up to him a lot (ha!) and one of her favorite things that he brought her were cheese balls. Those puffy little corn balls covered in oil and powdered cheese. She loved the way they went "poof" in her mouth and who doesn't love cheese powder, c'mon?!

Well, Daddy would go get canisters of Planter's Cheese Balls and share them with Emily when he had them. Emily would get sad whenever they would run out because then she had to lick the cheesy leftovers off of her fingers and then go wash her hands...but she still wanted more!

One day, Daddy brought home the biggest container of Planter's Cheese Balls that Emily had ever seen! It was as big as her baby brother. You could probably put him in the can and put the lid on and you would never know (she would have to save this thought for a later day).

Of course Daddy shared the Cheese Balls, but sometimes she would get hungry for them while Daddy was gone being a student and she wouldn't be able to get them because they were hidden because the cans were usually small. But not this can. It couldn't be hidden cuz it was as big as her baby brother.

So, one day when Mommy was taking care of her baby brother and the other little kids, Emily found the can of Cheese Balls and carried it to her room. She thought it would be heavy but it wasn't because Cheese Balls are mostly made of air and air isn't heavy like rocks are. Emily's room was at the end of the long hallway, past the kitchen and the bathroom and Mommy and Daddy's room. It had a big glass door in it too.

When she got there she closed the door, sat down and opened the can. There they were. Glorious, orange, puffy, cheesy balls of goodness. She reached in and plucked one from the rest and carefully began to chew until it was gone. Then another, and another and soon handfuls of the Cheese Balls were being shoveled in to her small five year old mouth. Scoop after scoop, she continued until at last she had reached the bottom of the can. Oh no! They were all gone! What was she going to do! She needed mo---

Uh Oh. All of a sudden, Emily didn't feel too good. Her tummy started to hurt and made funny noises. It didn't feel good to sit up so she made for the door and started to crawl to her mommy. She was going to die. She was sure of it. Those weren't Cheese Balls she had been eating, they were mini bombs. Someone wanted to trick her and get rid of her. Well, she wasn't going to give up that easy!

She made it to the potty room and managed to lie down on the floor. Who knows how long she was there or what happened while she was. It is all a mystery, though it is rumored that she threw up and felt better. But, ever since that fateful day, never again has Emily been able to eat the dreaded Cheese Balls. She has chosen to vanquish them by never purchasing them again.

The End.


P.S. Funnel Cake has a similar story attached to it except it revolves around a much older Emily and a very stupid mistake.